Tuesday, July 24, 2018

Pajamas ALL Day

I’m not gonna lie, I have been in these pajamas ALL day!
Not because I am lazy, but because I  have been a little under the weather today!
I got these beauties in the mail last week and just had to share them with you.
They are a cotton floral blend from Carrie Davis’s Unique Boutique. I got to pair them with my FAVORITE item of clothing in my closet, my comfy Grandpa Sweater.
They have made it completely easy to relax and practice some self-care in all day!
Thank you for such an amazing little boutique Carrie!

Stop Questioning Your Worth in Friendships

***LOOONNNNGGGG personal share of some growth that has occurred in my personal and emotional life over the past few months. I hope this can help somebody who is battling their worth in friendships. ***

While building and walking into the purpose God has laid out for me, I have learned this important lesson BIG time over the past few months. Not only have I been working hard on trying to build something for Him, but I have had fall backs and major things happening in my personal life at the same time. Life isn’t perfect. Social media doesn’t always tell the true story of what’s going on in somebody’s life. It is mostly a highlight reel because some things are too personal, and not meant for just anybody to know. Maybe later they will be used for testimony and to help others, but some things need only God and maybe a community to help get you through. That is why we NEED to have supportive people in our corner. We need the gals who we reach out to no matter what. The ones I knew I could cry to, ask for prayers (and knew they wouldn’t gossip or judge what was happening in my life), are the ones I KNEW automatically were my village. (THANK YOU LADIES, you know who you are boos.) Having a tribe and friends you KNOW you can trust and count on is NECESSARY in this life! I always say, it takes a village.
God has really revealed my true tribe and my true friends to me the past few months! You ladies who love me through the mess, the ones who support my business and encourage me on days I feel unworthy, THANK YOU FOR being AMAZING and loving me even in your own cares, heartaches and busy schedules going on in life. I hope I return the same kind of love and care to you, and if I don’t smack me across the face and tell me what you need! I’m there and I got you boo!
When God reveals things, sometimes it can hurt. It has been heartbreaking to accept some of these needed changes in relationships, BUT AMAZING for the most part. I emotionally finally let go of some people (ones that God had been trying to tell me for many years were toxic for my reputation (gossipers and backstabbers) and toxic for my emotional, mental and spiritual health. Here’s the thing, I am married now, about to start a little family (moving closer to adoption AND also TTC…..holy moly, what if adoption happens at the same time as pregnancy?? WHAT A BLESSING that would be). It is SO important who we allow into our family’s life as well. I’m a momma bear when it comes to my family, and we don’t even have kids yet! Yes, God, I will listen to you now. It took bringing a husband into my life, planning for our family and building something that my children and children’s children can hopefully one day be proud of and maybe even continue after I am long gone, to truly understand the NEED to have good, quality, trustworthy, cheerleaders in my life. I have finally realized the importance of committed and loyal friends, and not the ones who waiver, but the ones who are solid, you never wonder what your worth is in their eyes. STOP questioning your worth girlfriend. If you are reading this and have those friends and people in your life, STOP. Put the relationship down. Walk away. And love from a distance. Give that relationship to God girlfriend and give Him the space to work in it. Here is what will happen; He will either work in both of your hearts and one day bring restoration OR He will give you peace as you walk away and begin to form healthier and more meant for you friendships.
I don’t hate or dislike the people I have had to take some steps back from. As a matter of fact, I care deeply and love them (always will)……but from a distance. And that’s okay. You have to tell yourself, THAT.IS.OKAY. It is okay and actually Biblical to use wisdom in our close relationships. That doesn’t mean to hate, be cruel, not help if they ever need it etc. It simply means, “I’m not your people. And you are not my people.” You see, I don’t believe that just because somebody isn’t a good friend to me, makes them a bad friend in general. Not at all. I just believe that there is something about me or the patterns in our relationship that causes the friendship to just be toxic for the both of us. I truly believe the people I had to step away from are TRULY good friends to THEIR real tribe, that simply doesn’t include me and vice versa. At some point, you have to stop faking the friendship and move forward. It is the best thing for our emotional health and that of our families!
So remember:
1. It is Biblical to choose your friends wisely.
2. Both parties deserve good healthy friendships.
3. You only love yourself and the other person most when you can walk away in peace and love.
Some people you MUST love at arm’s length. It IS INDEED Biblical for a reason;
Proverbs 13:20 – “He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.”
Proverbs 12:26 – “A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.”
Proverbs 15:22 – “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”
Proverbs 20:19 – “A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid anyone who talks too much.”
Proverbs 11:13 – “A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret.”

Friday, July 13, 2018

Her Soul Purpose Scholarship

Every so often, I like to give away scholarships for 1:1 coaching with me. I haven't done it in a while, so it's about that time! I'll be giving away FIVE Scholarships for some 1:1 Pregnancy Loss Grief Coaching.

If you, or if you know somebody who has experienced pregnancy loss and could benefit from some 1:1 coaching, please share this link with them. All information remains confidential!

Friday, June 29, 2018

Embrace Suffering, Embrace God

Suffering is a feeling we don't welcome into our lives very well. Just hearing the word can send shivers down your spine. At least for me it does. Isn't it crazy that the very thing we do not want in our lives, is the very thing that brings us closest to God? 

I learned a long time ago to embrace suffering. No, it isn't welcomed in my world either. Like most people, I despise the feeling of heartbreak and emptiness. I loathe the thought of feeling like my soul is lost in the depth of sorrow and grief. As much as I dislike suffering, I embrace it because suffering pulls me into my Father's arms more powerful than I can even begin to try and understand. 

"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze." Isaiah 43:2

I embrace it because God is in the midst of all the chaos when my spirit feels shaken, when my world feels turned upside down. He is there. I feel Him. I seek Him. I embrace Him. When we learn to embrace suffering, we begin to embrace more of Him into our space. We allow Him to come in and fill the empty places with His love and peace. In those moments of feeling completely lost and unsure, He is there. 

I remember days where I would wake up completely unsure of what the future would hold. Miscarriage hurt my heart, took away a piece of our family. Even though I carry our baby in my heart, the truth of the matter is that he is not here physically with us. He isn't sharing in the joys of life. He didn't get to move to the Pacific Northwest with us and experience the beauty of nature and a different part of the world. That thought haunts me from time to time, but then God. God steps in, holds my hand and loves me. When suffering starts to creep back in, I embrace God. I lean into Him and remember whose I am. 

Suffering is not the greatest thing in life, I agree. But, when we are called to suffer and grieve, we are called to embrace a God who will never leave us. We are the closest to our Heavenly Father than we will ever be when our grief meets suffering. So, as you cry and miss your child today, embrace Him. He is near you. 

Friday, February 16, 2018

Friendship - Accountability or Criticism?

So, last week on my Tuesday Tea with Cryssie over on Facebook, I talked about how to be a good friend to somebody who has experienced pregnancy loss. Today, I thought I would write a blog on the importance of loving one another….flaws and all. Ephesians 4:32 teaches us to be kind one to another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, as God has forgiven us.

Friendship is hard. Much like marriage, it requires a selfless heart. It is difficult to maintain a long healthy friendship if one or both parties are selfish. I have been both the selfish friend and the selfless friend. Today, I want to touch on some ways that we can all work on being selfless friends.
First and foremost, we have to accept the other person. We are all flawed human beings and we all have room for growth. It is unrealistic to think that anybody in this world is perfect. That’s selfish of us. There is a reason why God tells us that we are to only worship Him. When we put expectations of perfection on other people, they will fail us. When they fail us, we all walk away feeling brokenhearted and disappointed. On that note, one might confuse helping a friend with criticizing a friend. Let’s face it, friendship should also have an element of accountability. We want friends in our lives who will encourage us to walk right with the Lord, and who is not afraid to love our spiritual walk more than fear of upsetting us.
So, how do we know when a friend just needs total acceptance or needs encouragement (accountability) to grow? I would encourage you to first and foremost, pray. Prayer is a must in any relationship. Allowing God to step in and guide the relationship will allow your friendship to grow in love and in peace. My advice to this topic would be that criticism would be a judgement about somebody’s personality or character trait. Holding somebody accountable for something is when we speak up to a friend who is doing something that defiles the word of God or themselves. These things are two totally different things, yet often we think they are the same thing. For example, complaining about how somebody talks, or how they do their makeup is criticizing that person, but setting a friend down to talk with her about getting drunk and sleeping around with several guys is holding her accountable. It is telling her that you love her and that she is precious and reminding her of who God says she is. Now, if you were to make fun of her or talk badly behind her back for her decisions, then that changes over to criticism and gossip. You never want to gossip.
Bottom Line, love your friends for who they are. If they are going down a road that takes them away from Jesus, help steer her back to Him, but don’t judge. Just love where she is. God loves us all where we are, and we should extend that same type of love.
If you find that a friend doesn’t want to change and is dragging you down with her, then pray about it and seek God’s answer on what to do with that relationship. He might need you to love her from a distance for a season, but that doesn’t mean you get the green light to put her down or start talking badly.
Next week, we’ll talk about keeping in contact with our friends. Friendships and community weren’t designed for us to be absent in them, they were designed for us to love, edify and help one another. We can’t do those things if we are an absentee friend. I’m preaching to myself when I say that being busy is not an excuse, being busy is a crutch and is incredibly selfish. We make time for what matters…but we’ll talk more about that next week.

Monday, January 15, 2018

Holly Days in the Pacific Northwest - ShoeDazzle

Who said fuzzy boots were out of style this winter!?

Maybe I'm just old fashion, but I personally love the fuzzy boot in or out of style!

The hubby and I took Holly for a walk in the winter snow and these fuzzy boots kept my feet warm and snug!

Shoe Dazzle has some great deals right now!
Use my link to get %75 off your first order!!!