Monday, February 11, 2013

My Heart Led Me Home

"The Lord takes care of His people." Psalm 1:6
I spent most of yesterday and all of today sick in bed with the flu.  This was discouraging to me as it seems like I have caught every cold and virus since I moved back home to Texas and not to mention my allergies have been off the hook cray cray!  I am no stranger to my health being attacked by the enemy but I also started to feel my spirit and finances being attacked this week.  I have been waiting for the hospital to call me back for a start date to start working and the wait has been frustrating as I'm ready to start work and to stop dipping into my savings.
I laid in bed this afternoon and prayed.  As I laid in His Presence I kept feeling Him telling me to look for the beauty in the chaos....that the answers to my questions and doubts were surrounding me.  This just confused me more because all I saw around me was the bottle of NyQuil my mother brought me, used tissue surrounding my bed from blowing my nose every ten minutes, an overweight Daisy staring at me wondering why I had not walked her, and a thermometer that I just took out of my mouth showing I had a fever.  At this point, I wasn't sure what could possibly be surrounding me that could answer my questions.  Soon after, the NyQuil kicked in and I passed out for the rest of the afternoon.
Lord Your Blessings pour out and overflow me!
Waking up from my NyQuil slumber, I felt so lost and confused.  I pleaded with God to show me what His plan for me was and why did He want me back home in Texas if things weren't going to be falling into place.  I wanted answers and more than anything, I wanted the ache in my heart to go away.  I got out of bed and had my Momma's amazing chicken and rice.  Then something amazing happened.... something small but I knew when it happened, THIS was the answer to my prayer..... my step-dad was listening to the radio and our song came on (Brown Eyed Girl by Van Morrison).  My Mom and I were in their bedroom and could hear him singing at the top of his lungs.  My Mom and I busted out laughing and the next thing I knew we were both singing and dancing with the dogs in each of our hands with my step-dad singing backup.  THAT moment put it all into perspective. 
"When you take that first step into the unknown, He won't let you go...."
I needed to be reminded of WHY He called me to move back home and I needed to be given that comfort and confirmation that I am in His perfect will for me and that He does have a plan and reason for me, HERE in Texas with my family.  It was a simple song but it made a world of difference.  It was just a couple of minutes of the night but it totally turned my thoughts around and got me back on track.  It reminded that an unseen God hears us and loves nothing more than to answer us. I am really not sure what is in store for me here in Texas but I do know that it must be pretty darn amazing for the enemy to keep attacking me and fighting to keep me from it and I also know it must be pretty darn amazing to have such an awesome God make sure to give me such a sweet confirmation like He did tonight.  I grow more and more amazed by Him.  His Love never fails and His Glory can be seen in everything when we seek it!  So, as you go through your day, make sure to look for Him and if you are having a hard time seeing Him, just ask Him to show Himself to you and I promise He will! He's pretty amazing like that!

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