I don't know about you all but when it comes to best friends, I don't want just any best friend but I want a spiritual best friend. A spiritual best friend is one who is committed to walking through life's ups and downs with you and who is committed to help you grow in God! A spiritual friend is somebody who in the midst of problems, stops everything to reach out and pray with you and who makes an effort to understand you.
This past year has stretched and grown me so much.I see so many things differently. The miscarriage taught me about the reality of hopes and dreams being taken from out of our grasp in a blink of an eye. It brought a phenomenal trust in God that I cannot put into words. My plans are not His plans and I'm so thankful for that. He knows what I need and when I need it and even in the deep pain, I must trust Him.
My recent health issues have taught me patience and courage. The scare of a breast nodule and getting mammograms and breast ultrasounds shook me to my core but I had a peace throughout the whole process. Maybe it was discerning that everything would be ok and that the nodule was not cancerous or maybe it was the trust I have built up in Him over the past few months. I'm not sure what it was but it was amazing. I felt His love in a big way and I saw His hand working in every detail of my health issues.
I have seen His hand vividly this past year. I would never ever want to relive this year again but I don't regret it for one second nor would I change one thing. The pain and frustration were real but so was His love. His love has been the only thing that has literally saved my life this past year. His love is what reached out to me in my moments of despair and brought me out of the pit of depression. This year has grown me so much and my relationship with God has grown leaps and bounds!
I love people deeper and truly see the beauty in every single person in my life. Just two months ago, I can sadly say, that wasn't me. Trauma and health scares have brought me to a place of peace with myself that leads me to a place of peace with others. I used to be critical of myself and of others but I have realized that life is too short for that and people are too important. I think of all of my friends and want to embrace each of them and I anticipate the new friends because those friends will be getting the best of me from the get go (sorry oldies, nothing personal.....it just took me some time and heartache to get here).
I say all this to say that I am extremely happy where I am in life right now. I know without a shadow of doubt that I am exactly where I am supposed to be. Right now in this moment, I am extremely grateful for an amazing husband who is above and beyond all of my prayers. I'm thankful for a job that allows me to serve others and help build the Kingdom of God. I'm also thankful for this longing for a spiritual friendship. It's this deep longing to connect with one friend, a best best best friend. Scripture tells us that a friend will stick closer than a brother.....wow, closer than our own blood. I want the kind of friend that scripture talks about, one who sticks closer than a brother. Don't get me wrong, I have AMAZING friends who are lifers and will always be forever besties to me but I miss having that one friend who is without a shadow of doubt, my BEST FRIEND.
When I think of that friend that is described in scripture, I think of the sister who a gal talks to every single day. They text, call, facetime and email everyday. There isn't a day that goes by that they are not in communication. I think of the sister who is fully committed to growing in Christ and who will be the one to encourage, hold accountable and cheer the other on. I think of sisters who are fully committed to communicating and committing to understand one another, even when it's hard to understand one another and especially when the waves are rocky. I miss that in my life and it's crazy but I didn't know it was missing until I built a love in my heart that's ready for deep and honest spiritual friendship.
One might ask, what about your husband? My husband is AMAZING and is definitely my best friend but.....he's definitely not a sister. He doesn't understand the importance of needing the dress that's on sale or that I can't wear a t-shirt to dinner with his parents or why I have a long bed time routine of face washing, hair grooming and teeth whitening and he especially doesn't understand my need to know how to put on false eye lashes. God made husbands and I'm SO thankful for that.....but He also created us for relationships with friends who stick closer than a brother. Tonight, I pray for my best friend. I used to pray for my husband and God brought me the most AMAZING husband ever! I know through the relationship I have with my husband that He will be faithful in bringing me a friend that will stick closer than a sister.
If you are lonely for a friend that will stick closer than a brother or sister tonight, close your eyes and pray for him or her. Trust that God has placed that desire in your heart for a reason and that it is not silly. It's not silly at all to desire the kind of friendship scripture teaches us about. He is a faithful God and He created you for real connection with others! I'm praying for my best friend tonight. I don't know who she is or what she is doing but I pray that God is guiding her, protecting her and loving on her tonight!